Love in Flight

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Pumpkin spice lattes are flowing from every coffee shop and everything else pumpkin flavored is lining the shelves.  (Hear me, I’m not complaining!) And this past weekend, I broke out a light jacket and wait for it… boots!  Fall is upon us, ya’ll!

And as expected, the sun isn’t shining as bright in these parts and isn’t as sweat-inducing as it was just a week ago.  Flip flops, pair by pair, are being set aside for warmer options.

But completely unexpected, at least to me, is the presence of butterflies and their bright flight in this fall weather.

This time last year my life was spiraling out of control, so it has been interesting to look back at what has taken place in the last twelve months and what a mighty work God has done.  And though there is promise in what He’s continuing to do, reflecting on the past is not a cake walk.  It’s messy and brings emotions dangerously close to the surface.

Despite the tidal wave of emotions that I experienced during this Sunday’s sermon, I surprised myself in agreeing to go to lunch with some friends after church.

As I turned the corner at the light towards the on ramp for the interstate, I saw what I thought was an orange fall leaf swirling lazily in the breeze against a dark gray sky.  And though fall is one of my favorite times of the year, I’m not ready for the endless stream of leaves falling into my front yard.  But at closer inspection, I realized it was a monarch, West Virginia’s state butterfly.

For such a fall-like day, I marveled over it’s brave flight through traffic and just how beautiful the bright oranges were in that quick glimpse against the sky.  Seconds later I turned onto the on ramp and as I accelerated my car, a song ended on KLOVE and the announcer began speaking directly to my heart,

“Did you know that butterflies can’t see their wings?  And though many would agree that the colors and patterns of their wings are some of the most beautiful artwork in nature, butterflies can’t see how truly beautiful they are.  People are like that as well.”

Just the night before I had learned that the man that I’ve set my sights on is interested in someone else, and I had cried hot tears as I asked my friends and God, “why am I not good enough?”

Hot tears threatened to flood my cheeks again as I remembered how just hours earlier a sweet woman from my church had stopped me to tell me how beautiful I am.  And then grabbed my hand after I thanked her and told me, “And may I add, inside and out”.

Today, as I walked back from the mailbox at the office, I was greeted by another monarch and I felt a tug inside that said, tell my story!

The fact is not lost on me that I took the above picture of the butterfly in September 2013, the year that I felt the most confident and established in myself.  September 2014 was the most destructive time of my life, of my faith and my self worth.  And this September, 2015, I’m finding hope around every corner and in every winged flight.

Though I have set my sights on earthly men, to only have those hopes dashed against the pavement time and again, there is a man who has not and will not fail me.  His name is Jesus and He thinks I’m beautiful, just like that orange streak of a butterfly against a dark gray sky.  He loves me with a love that I don’t understand.  He desires to spend time with me and for us to know each other intimately.

I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love.  No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.  Romans 8:31-39

And though I often forget all that He is and desires to be for me, He continues to craft ways to remind me, through sweet encounters at church, a spiritual hug during a sermon, and lessons of love in flight of a butterfly.

How has God reminded you of His love for you lately?