Confessions of a Boy-Crazy Girl {Book Review}

“Let this book take my focus off men and place it more directly on You. Help me to surrender the desire to “find” a man, and allow myself to be pursued instead. Let the only pursuit that I make be that of getting to know You more fully and coming to trust in Your timing, your will and your design for my life. Guide me in Your ways and this change of mind. I pray. Amen.”

And “this book” that I was talking about…I hadn’t yet completed when I prayed this prayer. I just knew that it was time for me to make the change from pursuer to the one being pursued. It was also time to make my own confessions of a boy-crazy life.

Confessions of a Boy-Crazy Girl by Paula Hendricks came to me through my first and only win of a blog giveaway. I never win anything, but I enter these suckers all of the time… you know, just in case.I had never heard of the book, but I was surprised that through sending my contact details to the author herself in order for my copy to be shipped, that this would be an opportunity for me to hold my own giveaway! (So be sure to enter below, even if you’re one that never wins either – it could be YOUR day!)

What I also didn’t realize was just how much this book (though geared towards young women) would get the ball rolling for my own long-time-coming transformation in regards to looking my sin in the face and ultimately having the courage to walk away from it and rely more heavily on God. (Thanks Paula!)Have you ever stopped to think about what (or who) controls your life? Like, honestly, what is the thing that manipulates your attitude, the way you dress or act, or even what stores you shop at? If you have and were honest with yourself, I’m sure you were surprised by your answer. And if you haven’t, take a moment and think this through.

For years I’ve done my own backwards scheming, trying to force my hand and manipulate God’s will towards making relationships happen with one guy or another.

I’ve held fragile, flawed human beings up on pedestals and all but worshiped them; valuing their thoughts of me and my future more than my heavenly Father’s.

I’ve lusted after unsuspecting men and even explained it away, not considering it a sin, because I felt it was harmless to them, and at the same time mistakenly thought it was harmless to me as well.

I’ve been wrong for a very long time. If I lived by the standards of the scripture that this blog is based on (Philippians 4:8-9 MSG), then I would have known that these thoughts were not ones that I should be entertaining.

But it was not until I read the following quote from Paula, did I realize this, despite the fact I’m a thirty-one year old with a Master’s degree; denial is denial, no matter how you look at it, and what I had been giving into was wrong.

“If a thought doesn’t pass the Philippians 4:8 test, rather than letting that thought captivate you, instantly capture it in your mind and turn it over to King Jesus. Then replace that stray thought with a thought that is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, or praiseworthy.” (Pg. 61)

It was a slap to the face and I’m pretty sure my cheeks burned crimson as they usually do when I’m caught in an embarrassing moment.Luckily this quote was prefaced with another just as eye opening.

“Until God gives you an eternal, sinless body, you are going to experience an ongoing fight between the flesh and the Spirit. You will decide who you allow to gain the upper hand by the choices you make. Which is more evident in your life, the works of the flesh or the fruit of the Spirit? (See Galatians 5:19-23).”

The Works of the Flesh The Fruit of the Spirit
Sexual immorality Love
Impurity Joy
Sensuality Peace
Idolatry Patience
Sorcery Kindness
Enmity Goodness
Strife Faithfulness
Jealousy Gentleness
Fits of anger Self-control

Through Paula’s own story of being awakened to the truth through God’s word I found myself suddenly facing my own sin and the glaring fact that I am wrought with sins, even ones that I wasn’t aware that I have been committing.

I had a lot to chew on. And so, doing what most Christians are afraid to do, I prayed a prayer that asked God to break me of what I’ve allowed to be my idol for so long, knowing full well that the wind in my sails and the proverbial rug beneath my feet would soon be pulled from me.I’ve been on this pursuit for so long that I almost feel like there’s a void, a gaping hole in me where it once took up space in my chest. I lay in bed at night, where I used to dream up fantasies of winning a man’s heart and suddenly find that I have no “comforting” thoughts to focus on to lull myself to sleep.So instead of wasting time fantasizing what it would be like to meet Benedict Cumberbatch, I’ve suddenly found myself initiating a completely different kind of pursuit after a guy that I have every right to hold on a pedestal.His name is Jesus.

Thanks to a not-by-chance win on a blog giveaway, I intend to get to know every inch of Him as I’ve studied every inch and detail of the lives of other men over the years.

How about you? What are your idols? Will you be bold enough to break them down and worship Jesus instead?

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