Strung Out on “What Ifs”

So when the dealership called at 7:45 Friday morning to tell me that my car would be finished by 8:30, hours before I planned for it to be done, I panicked.  

My mind is great at hyperlinking to the worstcase scenario.  So by the time I pulled my mom’s minivan into the lot of Sheetz (where I planned to buy something for lunch), my brain was strung out on “what ifs”.  I blindly grabbed a mango drink in a fun bottle, a bag of nuts and a pre-packaged sandwich and headed to the checkout.

I tossed back more than half the bottle of the mango tastiness, then noticed the label on the bottle: “Mellow Mango: SLEEP Sweet Dreams”.

Uh, what?

I turned the bottle around and read the back: “contains melatonin, L-theanine, magnesium, and 5-HTP to lull you into a deep, relaxing sleep that leaves you ready to take on the next day.”

The next day?  No, not the next day – today is MY day!  My mind went into overdrive as I went to pick up my keys at the dealership.  How was I supposed to work the next seven hours and be awake to enjoy my only real evening off?

And so then my mind went back into the downward spiral of “what ifs”.  I effectively blew a day of clean eating, and weekends are when I tend to be more relaxed in my eating plan. What if I gain back a bunch of weight over the weekend?  What if my cravings for caffeine return?  What if the new clothes I bought last week don’t fit on Monday?

But you know what, I made it through the remaining eight hours of work.  I went to dinner at my parent’s house, I picked up my car from the dealership and spent some quality time with the bestie.  This weekend, I was easy on myself and my eating plan, and this morning, my pants still fit!

It’s so easy to get caught up in the “what ifs” if something doesn’t go our way. 

Why do I turn into a perfectionist diva when that happens?  Simply because it’s easier to trust and rely on myself, than it sometimes is to trust and rely on a God who is bigger, stronger and much wiser than I can comprehend.

Needless to say, I learned a lesson on Friday.  Okay, a few different lessons:

• Lesson One: It’s okay to stress; sometimes that is how I can become more productive.  But what is not okay, is to allow it to work me into a frenzy, which allows me to do careless things, like drink 3/4 bottle of melatonin at 8:30 a.m.!

• Lesson Two: Relying on God and his purpose is scary, but it’s so much better than the crazy half-witted plans that I dream up.
  
• Lesson Three: It’s important to read labels…even if they’re slapped on fun bottles.  That’s it.  READ labels!